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How Are Holidays Divided After Separation?
Family Law
How Are Holidays Divided After Separation?
13 min read

How Are Holidays Divided After Separation in Alberta?
Introduction
Holidays can be especially difficult after separation. Parents may both want Christmas morning, the same weeks of summer or every birthday with their child. At the same time, children may be adjusting to new homes, changed traditions and the practical reality that they cannot always celebrate with everyone at once.
Alberta law does not impose one standard formula for dividing holidays. Parents may create their own holiday schedule through a parenting plan or agreement. If they cannot agree, the court can set a schedule based on the child’s best interests. An existing parenting order or agreement must generally be followed unless the parents agree to a change or the order is formally varied.
Common arrangements include alternating holidays each year, dividing a holiday into two parts or assigning particular celebrations to each parent. The right approach depends on the child’s age, traditions, travel requirements, family relationships and ability to manage transitions.
A thoughtful holiday schedule should give the child meaningful time with both parents where safe and appropriate, while avoiding unnecessary travel, conflict and disruption.
Is There a Standard Holiday Schedule in Alberta?
No. There is no automatic rule requiring parents to divide every holiday equally or alternate Christmas each year.
Alternating holidays is common because it allows each parent to enjoy entire celebrations without requiring the child to move between homes partway through the day. However, it is only one option.
Parents may agree to:
alternate each holiday annually;
divide a holiday into separate periods;
assign certain holidays to each parent every year;
alternate Christmas Eve and Christmas Day;
divide school breaks into two blocks;
allow each parent a set number of summer-vacation weeks; or
preserve established religious or cultural celebrations.
The arrangement should be based on the child’s circumstances rather than a general assumption about what separated families are supposed to do.
The Child’s Best Interests Come First
Parenting decisions under the federal Divorce Act and Alberta’s Family Law Act must be based on the child’s best interests.
Under the Divorce Act, the court must give primary consideration to the child’s physical, emotional and psychological safety, security and well-being. It must also consider factors such as:
the child’s age and developmental needs;
the child’s need for stability;
the strength of the child’s relationships with each parent;
relationships with siblings, grandparents and other important people;
the history of the child’s care;
the child’s views and preferences, taking age and maturity into account;
cultural, linguistic, religious and spiritual upbringing;
each parent’s plans for the child;
each parent’s ability to care for the child;
the parents’ ability to communicate and cooperate; and
any family violence or relevant safety concern.
A holiday arrangement that appears equal on paper may not be best for the child if it creates excessive travel, repeated exchanges or conflict during important celebrations.
Does the Holiday Schedule Override the Regular Schedule?
A properly drafted parenting plan or order should clearly state whether the holiday schedule overrides the regular parenting schedule.
In many arrangements, the order of priority is:
holiday and special-occasion schedule;
school-break or vacation schedule; and
regular weekly parenting schedule.
For example, a child may ordinarily spend alternating weekends with each parent. If the parenting plan states that Mother’s Day is always spent with the mother, the Mother’s Day provision may override the regular weekend schedule.
Without clear priority language, parents may disagree about which schedule applies. This is particularly common when a long weekend overlaps with a regular exchange or when Christmas break begins during one parent’s usual week.
What Holidays Should a Parenting Plan Address?
The relevant holidays will differ between families. A detailed plan may address:
Christmas Eve and Christmas Day;
winter school break;
New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day;
Easter weekend;
spring break;
Family Day;
Victoria Day;
Canada Day;
Alberta Heritage Day;
Labour Day;
Thanksgiving;
Halloween;
Mother’s Day;
Father’s Day;
the child’s birthday;
each parent’s birthday;
summer vacation;
professional-development days;
religious holidays;
cultural celebrations; and
other occasions important to the family.
Parents do not need a special provision for every day on the calendar. They should focus on occasions that would otherwise create uncertainty or that carry particular significance for the child or family.
Common Ways to Divide Holidays
Alternating Holidays Each Year
Parents may assign a holiday to one parent in even-numbered years and the other parent in odd-numbered years.
For example:
Parent A has Christmas Eve and Christmas morning in even-numbered years;
Parent B has the same period in odd-numbered years; and
the remaining part of winter break is divided according to the plan.
Alternating complete holidays can reduce exchanges and allow each household to develop its own traditions. The disadvantage is that a parent may not see the child on that particular holiday every year.
Dividing the Holiday
Some parents divide a holiday into two parts.
For example, one parent may have the child from December 24 until the morning of December 25, while the other has the child from Christmas morning until December 26.
This permits both parents to celebrate on or close to the holiday. However, it may require the child to leave one celebration to begin another. The arrangement works best when the parents live close together, exchanges are calm and the child handles transitions well.
Assigning Particular Holidays
Parents may decide that one parent will always have a particular holiday while the other receives a different holiday.
This may reflect:
religious practices;
cultural traditions;
extended-family gatherings;
a parent’s employment schedule;
travel requirements; or
personal significance.
For example, one parent may celebrate Christmas while the other places greater importance on another religious or cultural holiday. The parents can allocate time in a way that preserves both traditions without treating every calendar date identically.
Celebrating on Different Days
The value of a celebration does not depend entirely on the date shown on the calendar.
A parent who does not have the child on December 25 may celebrate on December 23 or 26. Birthdays can sometimes be celebrated on the nearest weekend.
This approach can reduce pressure on the child and allow meaningful traditions in both homes.
How Is Christmas Usually Divided?
Christmas and the winter school break often require more detail than other holidays.
A parenting plan may divide:
the final school day;
Christmas Eve;
Christmas morning;
Christmas Day;
Boxing Day;
the period between Christmas and New Year’s;
New Year’s Eve;
New Year’s Day; and
the remaining school break.
One approach is to alternate the first and second halves of the school break each year. Another is to alternate Christmas Eve and Christmas morning separately from the remainder of the break.
The plan should specify exact exchange dates and times. Terms such as “the first half of Christmas break” can create disagreement if the break contains an odd number of days or if the parties count partial days differently.
Parents should also consider the child’s sleep, travel and emotional comfort. Multiple exchanges over a short period may undermine the calm and stability the schedule is intended to provide.
How Are Summer Holidays Divided?
Summer arrangements may allow each parent one or more uninterrupted vacation periods.
The plan should address:
how many vacation days or weeks each parent receives;
whether the periods may be consecutive;
the deadline for selecting vacation dates;
what happens if both parents request the same dates;
whether priority alternates each year;
required travel information;
telephone or video contact during extended absences;
summer camps and activities; and
transportation costs and responsibilities.
A selection deadline is particularly useful. Without one, a parent may make reservations before confirming that the proposed dates are available.
The plan should also clarify whether summer vacation replaces or supplements the regular parenting schedule.
What About the Child’s Birthday?
There is no single correct way to divide a birthday.
Parents may:
alternate the birthday each year;
divide the day;
allow a short visit or meal with the other parent;
hold a joint celebration where communication is healthy; or
let the regular schedule apply while the other parent celebrates on a nearby day.
A joint event should not be treated as the ideal if the parents’ conflict would make the child uncomfortable. Two calm celebrations are generally preferable to one tense gathering.
As children mature, their views about birthdays, friends and activities may become increasingly important.
Mother’s Day and Father’s Day
Many parenting plans provide that the child will spend Mother’s Day with the mother and Father’s Day with the father, regardless of the regular schedule.
The plan should specify the start and end times and whether the provision includes the entire weekend or only the Sunday.
Families with stepparents, same-sex parents or other significant caregivers may require different language suited to their circumstances.
Religious and Cultural Holidays
A child’s cultural, linguistic, religious and spiritual upbringing is relevant to the best-interests analysis.
Parents should identify the celebrations that are important to their family rather than relying only on statutory holidays or the public-school calendar.
The plan may address:
participation in religious services;
cultural and community events;
dietary or ceremonial practices;
travel to extended-family gatherings; and
the continuation of traditions in each household.
Parents can support more than one heritage or tradition. The goal is to preserve the child’s identity and important relationships without placing the child in the middle of competing beliefs.
Holiday Travel With Children
A parent planning to travel should review the parenting agreement or court order before making reservations.
A parenting plan may require advance information such as:
travel dates;
transportation details;
accommodation information;
contact numbers;
destination;
names of accompanying travelers; and
an emergency itinerary.
International travel may require a valid passport and a consent letter from the other parent. A consent letter is not a legal guarantee of entry or exit, and border officials may request additional documents.
If a parent refuses to provide necessary consent, the other parent may need legal advice before booking or commencing travel. Where there is a genuine concern that the child may not be returned, the situation should be addressed promptly and carefully.
Holiday travel must also be distinguished from relocation. Moving with a child may trigger specific notice, objection and court requirements under applicable legislation.
What If a Parent Must Work During a Holiday?
Employment schedules can make a standard holiday rotation impractical.
Parents who work in health care, emergency services, transportation, hospitality or other shift-based occupations may need a more flexible plan. The arrangement can set deadlines for providing work schedules and choosing holiday periods.
A right of first refusal is sometimes proposed. This type of clause may require a parent who cannot personally care for the child for a specified period to offer that time to the other parent before arranging child care.
These clauses require careful drafting. Without a clear minimum period and notice process, they can intrude on ordinary parenting decisions and create frequent disputes.
Does Holiday Parenting Time Affect Child Support?
Holiday parenting arrangements do not automatically change child support.
Child support is determined under the applicable child-support legislation and guidelines. Parenting time may be relevant to the calculation in some circumstances, particularly where each parent exercises at least 40 percent of parenting time over the course of a year. However, reaching that threshold does not automatically eliminate support or require a simple offset.
A temporary holiday schedule usually does not change the underlying support arrangement. Parents should obtain advice before treating additional holiday time as a basis for withholding or reducing support.
What If the Parents Agree to Change the Schedule?
Parents can often agree to a temporary change, even where an order establishes the usual holiday schedule.
The change should be documented in writing. A clear email or signed written agreement can record:
the specific dates and times;
whether the change applies only that year;
transportation arrangements; and
whether replacement parenting time will occur.
Parents should avoid assuming that a one-time accommodation permanently changes the order.
If the parents want to make a lasting change, they may need to amend their parenting agreement or obtain a consent variation order.
What If a Parent Does Not Follow the Holiday Schedule?
A missed holiday can be emotionally significant, but the appropriate response depends on the circumstances.
Parents should first confirm the wording of the agreement or order. If there is genuine ambiguity, they may be able to resolve it through written communication, negotiation or mediation.
When a parent deliberately refuses to follow a clear order, possible legal responses may include seeking make-up parenting time, clarification, enforcement or a variation of the order. The available remedy depends on the facts, the terms of the order and the effect on the child.
A parent should avoid retaliating by withholding future parenting time. Competing breaches generally increase conflict and may harm the child.
Immediate legal advice may be appropriate where a child has not been returned, there is a credible safety concern or a parent is attempting to remove the child from the jurisdiction contrary to an order.
Practical Examples
Alternating Christmas
Two parents live in Calgary and their 10-year-old child handles transitions well. They alternate Christmas Eve and Christmas morning each year. The other parent receives the second half of winter break.
The plan includes exact exchange times and states that the Christmas schedule overrides the regular weekly rotation.
Extended-Family Travel
One parent’s family holds a Thanksgiving gathering outside Alberta every second year. The parents agree that this parent will have Thanksgiving in even-numbered years, provided travel details are supplied 30 days in advance.
The other parent receives Thanksgiving in odd-numbered years and has priority when choosing one summer-vacation period.
Different Religious Traditions
The parents observe different religious holidays. They agree that the child will spend each major celebration with the parent who observes it, while maintaining appropriate parenting time with both parents throughout the year.
This arrangement supports the child’s connection to both traditions without requiring artificial equality on every date.
Common Mistakes When Dividing Holidays
Using Unclear Dates and Times
“Christmas with Mom” does not identify when the period starts or ends. Specific dates, times and exchange locations reduce uncertainty.
Failing to State Which Schedule Has Priority
The plan should say whether holiday terms override the regular parenting schedule.
Dividing Every Day Equally
Multiple exchanges can exhaust the child and disrupt celebrations. Equal division is not always the most child-focused arrangement.
Ignoring Travel Time
A schedule may look fair but become impractical when the parents live in different communities or extended family is far away.
Booking Before Confirming
Non-refundable reservations should not be made until the proposed dates comply with the order or have been agreed upon.
Using the Child as a Messenger
Children should not be asked to negotiate holiday plans or tell one parent what the other parent wants.
Treating a One-Time Change as Permanent
Temporary flexibility should be confirmed in writing without assuming that it modifies the long-term arrangement.
Focusing Only on Parental Fairness
The central question is how the schedule affects the child’s safety, stability, traditions and relationships.
When Should You Speak With a Family Lawyer?
Legal advice may be helpful when:
the order does not clearly address holidays;
both parents claim the same holiday period;
a parent repeatedly denies scheduled holiday time;
international travel is planned;
one parent will not provide a passport or travel consent;
there is a concern the child may not be returned;
work schedules make the existing plan impractical;
a parent wants to change a court-ordered holiday schedule;
family violence affects exchanges or communication; or
the parents need a detailed parenting plan or consent order.
A lawyer can help interpret the existing documents, negotiate a practical schedule and determine whether a court application is necessary.
How Bridgestone Law Can Help
Bridgestone Law assists parents in Calgary and throughout Alberta with holiday parenting schedules, parenting plans, consent orders and disputed parenting arrangements.
We can help you develop clear terms covering holidays, school breaks, travel, exchanges and special occasions. If an existing agreement or order is unclear, we can explain how it may apply and help pursue an appropriate solution.
Where parents cannot agree, Bridgestone Law can help present a child-focused proposal to the court and seek an arrangement that provides stability while preserving meaningful family traditions.
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